Dear TBZ Community:
In this week’s Torah portion, parshat Vayshlach, the story of Jacob progresses. Jacob is on his way back home with his big family and all that he possesses. He is about to encounter his brother Esau, from whom he escaped, fearing for his life, many years ago. Time has passed, but he doesn’t know anything about his brother. Jacob, dreading his encounter with his brother, prepares himself and his people. And he sends messengers, instructing them in what to say when they encounter Esau:
וַיְצַו אֹתָם לֵאמֹר
כֹּה תֹאמְרוּן לַאדֹנִי לְעֵשָׂו
כֹּה אָמַר עַבְדְּךָ יַעֲקֹב עִם־לָבָן גַּרְתִּי וָאֵחַר עַד־עָתָּה
And instructed them as follows:
Thus shall you say to my lord Esau,
thus says your servant Jacob: I stayed with Laban and remained until now;
The medieval commentator Rashi explains the importance of the word גַּרְתִּי (“garti” – stayed, lived with):
The word גרתי has the numerical value of 613 – תרי״ג – it is as much as to say, “Though I have sojourned with Laban, the wicked, I have observed the תרי״ג מצות, the 613 Divine Commandments, and I have learned naught of his evil ways.
Rashi understands this to mean that despite living with Laban, who followed a wicked path, Jacob was able to continue to live a life of mitzvot, of commandments. It is poignant to think that this is the way that Jacob wants to be introduced to Esau: “no worries, I know I have been hanging out with Laban, but don’t judge me, don’t worry, I have done good.”
The Chassidic master Moshe Chaim Ephraim of Sudilkov, also known as Degel Machaneh Ephraim, the grandson of the Baal Shem Tov, adds another layer to Rashi’s teaching. He says:
או יאמר עם לבן גרתי ופירש”י ותרי”ג מצות שמרתי
והוא ע”ד איזהו חכם הלומד מכל אדם היינו אפי’ מיצה”ר
And Rashi interpreted, “[I abided with Laban] yet I kept 613 commandments.”
And this is in accordance with the teaching:
Who is considered wise?
One who learns from every person” (Mish. Avot 4:1)
–namely, even from the yetzer hara (evil inclination)
Degel Machaneh Ephraim shifts from Jacob saying: “even when living with Laban I was able to fulfill mitzvot,” to “because I was with Laban I was able to learn and fulfill mitzvot.” He fulfilled mitzvot not in spite, but because there was an opportunity to learn, to grow. In the words of Rabbi Sam Feinsmith from the Institute of Jewish Spirituality:
“Jacob was able to maintain his fidelity to the Torah not in spite of living in proximity to Laban, but specifically because he abided with Laban and related to him with loving curiosity, looking to learn from him”
This teaching is very powerful; it invites us to think about the ways we relate to encountering challenges, both personal and collective. Do we keep going in spite of it, trying to do our best? Or do we face the challenge, with curiosity to learn from it, to grow, as an opportunity?
In times of uncertainty and chaos, it feels as if we are fighting all the time to stay above water, to do our best despite what surrounds us. But this Torah, this teaching, invites us to work with and not in spite of. To be curious about what surrounds us even or precisely when it is “Laban.”
May God bring blessing and comfort to all of us and our loved ones. May we find strength, courage, and patience, and open our hearts with generosity. May all those who are ill find healing.
May the hostages soon be returned to their families and friends; may peace prevail and may the leaders of the world know to prioritize life. May those who are working for peace be granted strength and courage to continue their sacred work, and may we soon see peace and dignity for all.
Shabbat Shalom,
Rav Claudia